***

If the sense of something real was a pill,

the thick feeling of affection and loving,

of interconnection between two, three, hundreds of us…

Oh I so much wish to get high until full forgetfulness,

until after super sweetish bliss and this heavenly sap

to sneak into me and spill into blood roads as gentle lava

as the warm liquid of life;
to untie all the knots of grief and leave me laying
relaxed, airy and all yours,
without me being there me to be drifting without a form
on the surface of flowing moments;
to let me love the way they are - you and me.
I so desperately need that fucking pill.